Thursday, September 10, 2009

It's on like Mother Fucking Donkey Kong Jera!

So because I tagged my new bloggie buddy Jerasphere like last weekend, in retaliation, I have been tagged back. Fine- bring it on.





How bad are you?


Have you ever stolen?: Yes, I vividly remember stealing like Easter Candy and getting my ass beat. And then my dog bit my dad.

Have you ever cheated on a test?: Oh yeah. I think that's basically how I got through Geometry.

Cheated with someone else?: No, I have never cheated on anyone, but I have been cheated on.

How often do you use four letter words?: Too fucking much according to the family. But fuck them bitches.

How often do you drive above the speed limit?: UM, it's a mother fucking miracle I haven't gotten a speeding ticket. 35 mph= at least 50 mph. I take pride in getting to far away destinations in remarkable time. Ashland in under an hour? EASY. I got pulled over like two weeks ago on my way to work...my excuse? I had my period and need to get to the store for supplies. I got a warning. :)

Have you committed vandalism?: I like to call it "Neighborhood Revitalization". Yes- my friend Allena and I vandalized the park by my mom's house- which is where my kids play. AND, ever park visit I get to see the "S.K. loves T.R. " And the bonus? T.R= Tony Rusk, who lives behind me, with his wife and two kids, and is still hot.
Ran from the police?: Yes, a few times. But my problem? I usually laugh hysterically when I run, which makes me super easy to find.

Skipped class?: No, but I tried. I faked a note to get out of class my senior year- and totally fucking spelled my name wrong. Yeah- luckily, my mom didn't beat my ass but she did suggest that I learn how to spell my name since I was a senior and all.

Run over an animal?: No, I'm the idiot who swerves for squirrels.

Watched pornography?: Yes, and ironically- wish I could convince my husband to watch with me more often.

Made a prank phone call?: Yes- love doing that. I could have been on the original Crank Callers. Most memorable call? Calling Bergstrom Gifts asking if they sold scandinavian vibrators. :)

OK Jera- I think that's all of them. :) Now, I'm giving you (and everybody else) an open invitation to ask me whatever. Happy blogging!

3 comments:

scrapperjen said...

ROFLMAO!!!!!!!!!

Jerasphere said...

I just have one question...
Do you make prank phone calls while running from the police, going 50 in a 35, screaming "fuck the fucking fuckers", swerving to miss squirrels, while watching gay midget porn?

Brannon said...

Haha, you're pretty bad but the swerving for squirrels redeemed you. Good job!

That's awful about your surgery. My doc said nose/sinus surgery used to be like that but things have changed a lot. He said there would be little to no packing and I'd feel a slight burning after the first day but then I should be fine and back to normal by the next week. Well, that's what he says. There's no telling what will actually happen...