Of course you do.
Good Bra #1: I have it in this color, white, AND cream. This is probably my favorite because it doesn't feel like you are wearing a bra. The straps are comfy, the cups are comfy, you get a bit of cleavage but you aren't hoisting it up all day.
THE BAD: I thought YES! A super cute/sexy bra, a little cleavage, and it's satin! Yeah, it sucks. It sucks mother fucking hardcore. What I failed to notice is you see the straps? You see how thin and kind of off to the side they are? BAD. BAD. BAD. Your boobs are falling out of this thing like babies out of OctoMom's vag. They are everywhere. I was walking down a hallway and BAM! Boob fully out of cup. Not good. Your boobs will either go up or out through the middle. There is no way to keep your boobies in line with this thing. AND the strap that goes around your back? Is kind of thin, it's thinner than the other two so hi- back fat. Welcome to the party. Even if you don't have back fat- this bra creates it for you. What a bitch.
So with that I announce that Chicken from Tales From The Chicken Coop has awarded me with an award!
So yeah- rules. 7 things you don't know about me, I pass it on to 7 people. Which is going to be fucking hard since we are probably all familiar that the interweb perverts have found me. Seriously? What more can I tell you? *sigh*. So I guess it's time to let a small sliver of my freak flag fly, eh??
1. When I eat candy (M&M's, skittles, etc) that has any kind of color associated with it I have to eat them by color. So like the blue ones, then green, then orange, etc. And I have to line them up by color. I have always considered this OCD until I saw a Law & Order Criminal Intent episode where the killer did that- line things up (in her case it was peas) and they said it's a sign of like some kind of mental illness. FAN-fucking-TASTIC. I'm sure it's just for the show, right?
2. I can't just use a cup straight out of the cupboard. I have to get it myself, and blow into it. I have no idea why. I just do. And it annoys Matt to no end because he thinks I'm weird. I know that, but still. But it's fine if I'm at a restaurant. It's only glasses out of my house. I'm sometimes ok at other people's houses. Not always.
3. I have an obsession with underwear. Since I was a little girl, I have had an undying love for underwear. Any kind. I prefer bikini but will really wear anything. Walking into Victoria Secret immediately makes me happy. I cannot walk out of there without buying underwear. I can now walk past the store without buying something, but once I walk in I have no control over myself.
4. I am obsessive with shaving my legs. I shave them everyday whether they need it or not. I remember being little and being fascinated with my mom's legs and how smooth they were. I tried shaving my legs at age 9 where I cut myself badly. I thought I got an artery because I had two totally soaked towels. And in the summer when I wear shorts for pajamas I will fall asleep by rubbing my legs together because they are ubber soft.
5. I have a really thin, long, hardly noticable scar (now) on the inside of my right leg. That is from when I was really young, maybe 6 or 7 and I stepped on a window screen that was on the ground and the corner came apart and cut my leg. I wasn't supposed to be playing over there so my mom was really mad. I remember Travis and I putting a ton of bandaids on my leg thinking mom wouldn't notice that. ;)
6. In the summer I have a little white line that goes across my nose because when I laugh and/or smile I squinch up my nose. It's probably one of my favorite features. BUT the least favorite feature is the bump on my bottom lip. I got THAT when I was young, maybe 5 or 6 when I locked my mom out of the house (who was taking the garbage out), and I ran from the door, tripped on something, and banged my lip on a metal bed frame. I *probably* should have had stiches but mom couldn't afford it so now I have the bump. It's not huge, it's actually quite small and you'd likely never notice unless you kissed me.
7. I always thought that I'd meet my husband like Sleepless in Seattle. Or once I read in a book where this couple where email friends (they were co-workers so emailed a lot about work too) for years. And one day they met for work and BAM! Relationship just happened. And I always kind of wished I would have a guy make some grand romantic gesture. Like proposing during dancing, dedicating a song, etc. Anything with music hooks me. I am a sucker for music and tying music into life. Every important (and every significant memory) event of my life is tied to a song.
OK- so the 7 lucky lamb whores:
6. My Love Bugs
There you go lambies! I have reasons for nominating all of these fabulous people but I'm keeping it to myself this time. ;)