Last night Matt asked me what I wanted for Christmas because he clearly hasn't seen the list I've already typed out, I mentioned that I wanted a goat. And not just any goat, a fainting goat.
Our conversation went almost verbatim:
S: So I want a goat. A fainting goat for Xmas.
M: What? No. Where the fuck are you going to put that?
S: Obviously in the house- he'll freeze outside. Sad.
M: Sara- goats are big. And they stink and shit everywhere.
S: Not if we get one of those midget ones. And litter box train it.
M: *blank stare*
S: What? Are you denying how awesome this would be?
M: Yes, I am. Are you going to clean up after it?
S: *laughing out very loudly* No! You know I don't do that.
M: Exactly. So why would I want one?
S: Hi- sometimes it's not about you. Sometimes other people want fun gifts. I bet you know someone who has goats from your 4H days.
M: My parents neighbors had goats. They eat all kinds of weird shit. I saw them eat a soda can once.
S: SEE!!! You hate taking out garbage and recycle- it'll be like your helper!
M: No. We aren't getting a goat.
S: See? THIS? This right here? This is you being a dream killer. Think of the homeless goats. And feel bad.
M: I am. 'Night.
S: Asshole goat killer
But I demand you watch this video and tell me this isn't awesome and fun. For the whole family.