I've already mentioned is practically on life support for this year but I haven't showed you our outdoor illumination.
Before I get into it, you should check out Finny's blog because she has some um... strong feelings about decorations in general. So Finny..... Ghetto Christmas 2010 is dedicated to you. Behold:
Especially when you compare it to my neighbors across the street.
Now, last year I was outside supervising outdoor illumination 2009 because it was 70 degrees and October when we started. But Matt didn't start until after Thanksgiving, complained about freezing his ass off doing so, and just put the first few of whatever he found. Where are my deer? My giant sleigh? Why isn't half of my shit lighting up? Why do you only have lights on one railing? Where are my poinsettia garland with matching red lights for the god damn door frame? Why do the icicle lights not go down the side of my house?????
This? Is what happens when you have a breakdown in quality control. When you decide micromanagement is too much.
Clearly, everybody works better with someone screaming, "Get the fucking Santa over here now!!!". I assure you- next year will be different. Oh yes. Next year we are going to beat the bitch across the street.
It's fucking ON.
On a less aggressive note, NOBODY has sent me any questions for tomorrow's Dear Sara column. Hi. I need questions or I can't do a fucking column. Have your friend send me a question. Send me something stupid. Hypothetical questions even. I don't even care what kind they are. Do you have a life crisis? Debating on a vibrator? Have a question about me? Whatever- email me whores. Don't be lazy. firstname.lastname@example.org