... because I'm sick. Seriously. I have the stomach flu and I am not happy about this at all. I had one small bag of Fritos for lunch (don't judge) and I've thrown Fritos up like 5 times. Like dudes... where is it all coming from? So my mouth tastes like Fritos and I'm sure that's not helping me trying not to barf.
I'm not a fan of barfing. There is nothing sexy about barfing. Why people chose to barf to lose weight is beyond me. This? Is not worth it.
But that means I watched the news today because I had nothing else better to do when I got home from work. And can I just say that Nancy Grace is fucking certifiable? I don't like her but after watching her show for an entire hour I'm convinced that she riles people up for fun. It's like shaking a bee's nest and hoping that a bee doesn't go rogue and kills someone with it's stinger butt. All of these news shows are so irresponsible it's a wonder they are even on air. I mean, I get freedom of speech and all, but damn. But here we go on my WTF moments.
1. Mom kills baby over Farmville. Surely you've heard of this by now. It's tragic and senseless. It makes me even more convinced that people should have to have some kind of mental competency tests in order to have babies. I know that would cause such an uproar over civil liberties and what you do with your body but god fucking damn. How many people are there out there that would love to have a baby? Can't have a baby, can't afford adoption or surrogacy and so they go without their whole lives feeling a void. But then you have people like this, who kill their baby because of Farmville. Um, why? WHY? Because it's not like Farmville is even a timed game for jeebus sake. I'm glad this lady is actually pleading guilty and not using some shit insanity defense but at the end of the day, that poor baby. It's tragic. I can't even think about all of the people who have kids that absolutely should not have them because it breaks my heart. Some people feel like rescuing puppies... I feel like rescuing babies. If I could adopt kids who are living in abused situations I absolutely would.
2. Charlie Sheen. I don't even have to link to this as I'm sure you are all well aware of what he's up to. But I'm sorry. Can someone just step up and give this guy an ass kicking? Dude- you are too old to be pulling this kind of shit. I get that you have an addiction and that's awful, but pull yourself together. Come on. Shame on CBS for continuing to coddle him, shame on his publicists who are continually making up stories to cover up the fact he's a drug addicted, prostitute loving hot fucking mess. You know it's bad when you EX WIFE is trying to help you. And I feel bad for Denise Richards, who was really given a bad rap when she divorced Charlie, but come on. You know it has to be bad when a woman, 6 months pregnant, files for divorce. And I'm sure she just wants to see him get better for her girls because they need a dad in their life. And his other baby mama.. Brooke.. what a hot fucking mess herself. I just hope he has a nice trust fund for each of his kids that he can't snort. They'll surely need it for counseling later on.
3. Superior cop. I'll be the first to tell you I don't think highly of the Superior Police Force. I will also admit I haven't had a ton of dealings with them myself but what I have had I've been less than impressed. (Nothing ever happens when my window gets shot out, I call about drug activity and nobody ever comes but then I see them buying so I guess it explains it, etc). You hear rumors that the cops in Superior are all messed up and shouldn't be doing their jobs but it's not like you can do anything based on rumors. But this guy was arrested for punching his girlfriend in the face, while he was driving, and she got out, hitched a ride back to Duluth and filed charges. Folks, she got out on a HIGHWAY and hitched a ride. Um, who does that? Someone making it up? Not likely. So this guy is pleading not guilty and that just makes me angry. Nobody ever has the right to lay their hands on someone they supposedly love. Ever. This guy is class A asshole.
4. The mom who killed her kids for being mouthy. Seriously- this woman is mentally insane. I'm sorry. She has some serious issues. First off, she bought a gun and then when she got it, that's when she killed her kids. So at no point in the three day waiting period to get a gun did she contact her family counselor to say "hey- we're having these issues... what should we do?" No. She kills her kids for being mouthy. And by all news reports these kids seemed like good kids. Straight A students, sociable, polite, etc. The daughter complained to a school counselor and after some investigating they figured everything would be ok. Well guess what? Now both kids are dead and this mom was found lounging by the fucking pool covered in blood. Like, no big deal. I know I was a mouthy bitch when I was a teenager. I know it, but at no point did I think my mom was going to kill me. And Olivia mouths off but I never, EVER feel like I'm going to kill her. What kind of fucking parent does that shit? It's not ok. And I hope this woman goes to prison for life and realizes what a terrible person she is and I hope she rots in the deepest belly of Hell.
So there you go. I'm off to eat some soup, maybe some saltines and see what's on TV. I'm leaving you with something funny, though. I want you to watch the amazingness of The Ricky Gervais Show. (Yes, this is real. Karl is real. This is how he really is. LOL!)