Wednesday, March 23, 2011

My (second) grown up vacation. Without kids.

That's right. I am going on a VACATION. A grown up one.. without kids. It's going to be glorious. The first grown up vacation was our honeymoon and that was fun.. but in June that would have been 7 years ago.

It's time mama got out.

So since Las Vegas is on my 30/30 list (which I promise an update is coming soon).. I decide oh fuck it. Spend what I have and just book the son of a bitch already. Except I couldn't because I'm a pussy and I can't just blow money like that. (Unless it's on clothing or music. Or Wendy's chicken sandwiches. Then it's OK.)

But Allegiant had a buy one/get one flight (but you still pay fees).. and then there were good hotel deals and yeah. I couldn't pass it up. So I did it.

Matt and I will be spending the hottest week of the year in Vegas... at the Luxor.

 Because frankly, I'll probably never get to Egypt so I'm going to pretend I'm going to Egypt. I just have to prevent Matt from walking like an Egyptian in front of the damn place. He can be embarrassing.

But I'll be ok with the heat. Matt might die, but we're going to look into his life insurance. (Which is only sensible.. shut up.) I'm not worried because while you all are doing housework and cleaning up poop from animals/kids/husbands/yourself... I'll be sitting poolside.
 Most likely with some kind of fruity drink. Hopefully with an umbrella. And let's hope that I'm not the chunkiest girl at the pool. That might be sad and might force me to have multiple fruity drinks. All with umbrellas.

But the BONUS, in very small print, on my confirmation was that we got two free tickets to a show. One of the shows was KA by Cirque du Soleil. Which, hello- going into this I knew I couldn't afford a show... but I can afford a free show! So we just called and got our tickets reserved. Hell fucking yes.
So I'm going. Well, Matt's coming too. But when are we going?? The last week of July, baby! So if you live in the area or have an uncontrollable (hopefully not homicidal/sexual/creeper) urge to see me.. then you should come.

Have you been to Vegas? Are there things that we MUST see/do? Remember.... we are officially broke and so we have to do as much as we can with as little money as possible. Do you have tips for getting free/reduced stuff? Do you have a friend/relative who works there and would get me a deal? Because I want to be their BFF.

So yes. I'm excited. It's going to be a good vacation and I am already excited about it. But this means I need to get serious about my weight loss because I really, really, REALLY don't want to be the chunkiest girl. I'm hoping there is an obesity convention so I'll look super small compared to everyone else. I also will have to tan because I don't want to fry out there, and I don't want to blind people with my almost translucent thighs. Nobody wants that. Even Matt probably doesn't want it either, but it's what he gets. :)

16 comments:

Oilfield Trash said...

That is so awesome that yall are going.

I am very jealous as I have always wanted to go there.

Aimee said...

OMG I love VEGAS and I go as often as I can. Plus being from soutern CA and only a 4 hour drive away its pretty easy to get over there.

I know how to do Vegas cheap. :)

Where you can find cheap drinks:
O'Mallys- $1 margaritas super strong
Fat Tuesdays- Decently priced drinks plus $1 jello shots!
Imperial Palace... You can usually get free drinks over at their Dealertainer gambling area without gambling (if the cocktail waitresses are being nice). I would recommend checking it out anyway because its free entertainment.

If you feel like gambling a bit and like BlackJack then Hooters has $3 tables and the BEST margaritas in Vegas (in my opinion). Also MGM grand has one of the best odds on the strip.

I would also recommend checking out the Forum Shops and the moving statues show that happens there,

go eat at Pinks Hot Dogs at Planet Hollywood.

If you feel like going out dancing do not pay any cvover charges. You can usually get free wristbands or package deals from the promoters on the strip. Ipaid $20 for 4 passes to 4 clubs. :)

Check out the Playboy rooftop at Palms... Best view in Vegas

I have more if you need them

Dana Leigh said...

I'm glad you get to go on a real vacation! I've been to Vegas three times but it's been over 10 years since my last visit. Whatever casino/hotel you venture into, get a coupon book at the front desk and they'll be tons of BOGO offers for food, shows, activities, stores, etc. but they're all different at each hotel so pick them up. I am not a gambler so when I was there, we went on a tour of Hoover Dam and the Ethel M. Chocolate Factory. You can also do helicopter/airplane rides over the strip at night. Go to the Paris hotel and go up to Eiffel Tower at night so you can see how beautiful the strip is. Oh and as much as they might not be coordinated with your outfit, wear comfy shoes! You will do tons of walking. Even if that casino that you're walking to looks like it's just right down the street, it's not! It's further than you think! Where are you staying? You'll be eating buffet style more than you might want to because it seems like that's all there is. I hear Monte Carlo's buffet is awesome.

Kate Weber said...

Vegas is amazing. But I am extremely biased since I LIVE here.

You're going to have such a great time! KA is one of the most amazing shows on the strip and you are absolutely going to LOVE it! It's phenomenal!

Also, unless you're planning on going to sit down or something, wear comfy shoes with good arch support. You don't want to be halfway down the strip when your feet start hurting and you end up walking barefoot on the nasty ass pavement.

There are so many fun things to do. Planet Hollywood is one of my favorite casinos to walk around it. There's great shopping and the architecture is cool. Belagio has the great water fountain show and the mist (if there's a breeze at least) feels great on a hot day. The inside is amazing as well! The inside of the Cosmo is really cool too! That's the newest one on the strip.

Have a great trip! It's going to be amazing!

Jandy xx said...

oh wow hun, im so excited for you!!!!! umm my memories of vegas involve a huge frozen drink, and the rest of the day/night in the toilet, so umm, yeah, maybe ask someone else!!!

prettylittlereckless said...

WELL... you know I've been to Vegas ;) Bellagio Buffet is AMAZING. It's $20/ea and seriously- we did one buffet a day and that was enough food for the day. It probably wont be that bad since it'll be hot and you won't feel like eating anyways. :) But yeah- go to the conceirge (spell?) desk and ask for a book or something. They'll have deals and just walking the strip, you'll get assaulted with deal things. And I PROMISE you won't be the chunkiest girl there. Swearsies. You will LAUGH at all the kinds of people that go to Vegas. omg.

So YAY! Adult vacation!

cakeologist said...

I love Las Vegas! My husband plays poker (he is pretty damn good) but I hate to gamble so I leave him in the poker room and spend all my time shopping up and down the strip (I love to shop, but hate to spend money so I still have a great time even though we are super broke).

You are going to have so much fun!

Lost.in.Idaho said...

Luxor has a DAMN GOOD steakhouse. It is definitely a must do, as long as you don't mind droppin some coin.

It's a fun town, and you will find TONS to do. Don't worry about that.

We just demand a blog post when you get back.

AmberLaShell said...

wow, i am totally jealous.. i have never really had a vacation to anywhere great. living in dallas, i don't consider galvaston great, and it's the only place i've vacationed to.

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Ang said...

I'm so excited for you! I've been to Vegas a few times - it's pretty dope!

Freemont Street - it's in old downtown (down towards the Stratosphere) - it's a covered street that displays a light show with music every half hour or so... may sound corny, but you'll be sorry if you miss it - google it. free.

Also - if you're renting a car, I'd suggest driving to Red Rock and taking the loop around there - it's a pretty place to see! Free.

Also, within driving distance - The Hoover Dam, I think it's like 30-45 minutes - totally and completely free and worth it.

Other than that - all the hotels have free valet parking, so google the best ones to see, because they are all pretty cool in their own way. You can seriously spend days just going into the hotels.

SpiritPhoenix said...

Two things in Vegas are cheap. Drinks and Food. They can be expensive, but most often they are cheap.

A trick I do to get free drinks. Go to the penny slots. Sometimes you can change the 5cent ones to penny. Then when a cocktail waitress walks by, make sure you are playing. Stop when she walks away with your order, but remember to start again when she comes back. I did that and got a free drink for like 20 cents of play.

Annah said...

Oh sweetie you're going to have such a wonderful time! :)

So there are a gazillion things to do in Vegas and I won't bog down your comment section with it. Email me and I'll tell you my MUSTS. Been twice.

Also, stayed at the Luxor and it is WONDERFUL! :) They have a Starbucks too. Ween!

Tina said...

Go see Anthony Cools at the Paris hotel. It is rude and entirely too funny hypnotist. You will laugh so hard you will cry and probably pee your pants as well - trust me. Best $50 I've ever spent on entertainment.

Great sex shops in Vegas as well, especially the ones where the hookers are shopping for their favorite johns. Pushing shopping carts full of nasty toys in their plastic high heels, talking on their phones about customer preferences.

Try to get to the Pepper Mill to eat, it's a great place to eat for cheap.

Nicki said...

Color me green with envy....and make sure you have an umbrella drink in your readers' honor!

Mom Taxi Julie said...

I've been to Vegas 3 times and I think I blogged about all 3. Do a search on my blog. Don't worry about your size or a tan. It's dim lighting inside lol. I'm tempted to book a trip, it's pretty cheap from here :) We stayed at the Luxor the first time we went.

SimplyStacia said...

Obesity convention? I almost spewed hot tea from laughing at that one. You'll look AWESOME!! You need to get comfy in your own skin.

Have fun on that amazing trip. Bullshit on what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. I wanna hear the stories! I need to live vicariously through someone going to Vegas. You're the chosen one!!