Thursday, May 19, 2011

5 pounds of amazing and The Tugger.

This won't make any sense to you unless you know my brother. My brother is going to be 27 this year, he's also the biggest effing goofball I will ever know.

He also has a strong love for gummi bears. He'll take gummi worms in a pinch, but gummi bears are his go to snack. Or meal. Whatever.

Last night, while watching a marathon session of Extreme Couponing followed by my DVR'd episodes of Strange Sex (wholesome night all around) I saw a commercial from Vat19.com. It wasn't just any commercial. It was, quite possibly, a sign from Baby Jeebus saying I should do more for my brother.



Folks. I don't know if you can get any more awesome. Oh wait. But you CAN.



Just watching someone put that in their mouth is worth buying it.

OK. So I have been fascinated by the freaks on that show Strange Sex. Now, I consider myself to be a fairly open minded person. I don't always understand it, but you know. As long as I don't have to do it, then have a ball. Maybe literally. But last night I watched an episode about a guy who was pretty pissed off her was circumcised. So pissed off he decided to invent something called The Tugger to um... fix it. Give his wee wee some "slack" at the end.

Basically it's a cup that you hang off your penis and it tugs at the end... and after awhile (like months or more) you look like the foreskin is restored. Now, I don't have a penis. I've kicked a guy in the penis before and from his reaction alone I can just assume that the penis is not something you should be fucking with. (Considering the episode before showed a guy who LOST his penis because he fell on a chicken feed line. Seriously. Goats are obviously safer.) For those of you who don't get what I'm talking about.. go HERE. It's an explicit video on how to put it on.

Guys- I want you to weigh in on this. Would you do this? Would you wear it under your trousers to work??

I will tell you that if Matt ever told me he wanted this we'd be done. Seriously. Having to deal with balls is bad enough but to throw a cone and some binder clips into it? No. I'm not getting paid nearly enough for that.

7 comments:

Oilfield Trash said...

Count me out. I don't need anything else hanging around.

prettylittlereckless said...

ahhh I'm at work, can't watch that vid, but um- whoa. LOL....and for guys- how the hell do you even explain that to your significant other? Uh... hey, so there's this thing called the Tugger.

WTF...

middle child said...

Man....I got nothin' except to say that the gummy worm looked really familiar.

Jen said...

As a woman, I have to say- circumcision is next to cleanliness.

Also slightly scary, you can now get pejazzling kits. Gives new meaning to "disco stick" let me tell you.

Jo-Anne Rambling said...

That is one large gummi bear I do like gummi bears but not that big thank you same for the worm.......

Rose said...

The freeze frame of the gummy worm video is bordering on pornographic. I love it!!! LOL

So hilarious!!!

Mom Taxi Julie said...

what Rose said!