It seems like forever ago, but one of my lovely lambwhore blog readers submitted her Dear Sara question in the form of an entire blog post. Go HERE to read it.
And while I will never say I have any kind of personal style, I will say my mantra would be "try not to look like a fat ass" because that's what I do. I try to find clothes that will hide as many imperfections on my body as possible. So without further ado... here are my tips.
1. Do not wear rompers. Unless you are a toddler shopping at Gymboree, a grown ass adult should absolutely never, ever wear a romper. I'm sorry. They are not cute. Part of the problem is that most are strapless, and strapless can go one of two ways. If you have actual boobs that are D cup and over your boobs will look massive. You just can't make them look cute. They will pull the romper fabric forward and make you look weird. If you have boobs in the large B or C cup range- your boobs will look droopy. I look at these girls and they all have the droopy boob going on--- that's not attractive. And if you have an A cup? Don't. Just don't. You will only accentuate what you don't have.
2. Jumpsuits. Just like rompers. I hate them. You look ridiculous. I firmly believe you should not have to remove all of your clothing in order to pee. That's pressure nobody needs.
3. Pants with patterns. I'm talking about pants with animal prints or just a lot of pattern going on. Stop it folks. You aren't kidding anyone, we know your ass is full of cellulite. If you think that material of pant will let your cellulite stand out? Don't wear the pants.
4. Bikinis. Ladies. I understand bikinis come in a plethora of adorable patterns and styles. I know how bad you want to wear one. I know, I'm right there with you. But for the love of baby Jeebus and everyone else at the beach, please look in the mirror before stepping out. Now, I don't have a flat stomach at all and I've got my pouch. I don't know if I would ever have the balls to go out in a bikini unless I had a flat stomach. To me, seeing someone with a roll (or 3) isn't attractive. I wouldn't want people staring at that so I always make sure my bathing suit is flattering. Sure, they cost more but trust me- you will look better and you will feel better. And honestly? If you are shopping at Lane Bryant you have no business being in a bikini.
5. Jeans. Jeans are SO hard to buy and I get it. Especially if you have an ass and thighs. If you have a bubble butt (I do) then you need pockets on your ass. You do. Do not buy jeans with the pockets with a flap on them or anything decorations that say "Look at my ass" because you do not need that. Those are for girls with no ass. It's like faux ass for them. Ok?If you have more weight on the bottom buy a darker wash of pant- it is a total slimmer. And for the love of god- if you have a muffin top- you need the next size up. It sucks but it will make you look slimmer without the roll.
6. White is not a fat girl's friend. Black may be slimming, but white makes everything look bigger.
7. Accessories are fun. Seriously- they are. When in doubt either a silver or gold long necklace will do. *Unless* your shirt has a lot of beading, gemstone type things or a lot of detail in the neckline... then avoid necklaces. It's just too much. If you don't think you can get the whole necklace thing down- find a pair of earrings that match your shirt and then matching bracelets. Even if they aren't the same color.. look for colors that match what you ARE wearing. Like, if you have a blue shirt... try green, orange or yellow accessories for example. My rule of thumb is I wear two- I usually never wear bracelets, necklace and earrings all together-- unless an outfit can pull that off. If I wear bracelets I put at least 3 on and mix/match them.
So those are like... the things I keep in mind when I shop for myself. And when I do go shopping, I always look at the pictures on the wall, how they have the mannequins dressed. They pay people a lot of money for this kind of advertising- use it. A great store to do this in really is Maurices. They have funky sizing (like, a large in one shirt might be an XL in another similar style) so take two sizes of stuff to try on. And if you find a shirt or something you really like in a store and don't know what it would go with? ASK someone-- that is their job. They know everything that is in that store and you maybe walked by a really cute matching sweater without giving it a second thought.
My go to outfit is always a pair of jeans and a bright colored top. I'm a HUGE fan of plain colored tshirts with a matching lace bottom cami underneath. (Maurices sells *the best* lace bottom cami ever in a bunch of colors.) Then I wear matching accessories and cute shoes.
And my last piece of advice? If you don't think you look good? Or you think it fits/feels weird? Don't buy it.
What fashion don't do you think people should avoid??