For those of you newbies playing catch up with us, enter at these back links for more chances to win your VERY own KY Intimacy Experiment set.
Week One- Love Nest
Week Two- It's Not Just About Sex
Week Three- Everything Old is New Again
OK. So this week was all about maintaining sexual attraction. When you are first dating a person they are kind of mysterious and part of that is what attracts you to them. You don't know what makes them tick, you don't know all of the quirks about the person but you know there is a chemistry between you two.
But then you move from casual dating to a serious relationship. You move into together. This person maybe becomes your best friend and you get married. Think about the things that you stop doing once you get real comfortable with the person. Maybe you pee while they are brushing their teeth. Maybe you text on a date with the person. Maybe you do activities in separate rooms. Maybe you let your kids (or pets) sleep on the bed therefore killing any chance of having sex. These are the things that kill a marriage. Or at least the intimacy of it. Let's face it- it's hard to feel turned on by someone who is clipping their toenails while you watch your favorite show and they can't be bothered with showering since it's the weekend.
Our day time activity was to think of ways we've kind of slacked in this area. Or what do we do now in front of our partner that we would never have done if this were say, the beginning of a relationship. For me, I really can't think of any. Truly. I refuse to let Matt into the bathroom when I'm doing anything. I just really like doing everything in private. Plus- no. No, I don't feel like having a convo when I'm doing any of the things I would be doing in a bathroom. And I have to say- I do a really good job at maintaining myself like I did when we were dating. And Matt totally agrees. Even he couldn't think of anything that I do that I never would have done when we were dating.
But Matt on the other hand? Oh... I can think of a few, most of which I'm going to share for his sake. HA! But after talking about it, he realizes that I'm serious when I'm grossed out by it. I'm sorry- but I can't get into the mood when you are farting non stop. It completely kills it for me. So please for the love of jeebus- don't eat the foods you know are going to make your intestines revolt OR take something before hand. So he agreed he would and agreed that it would not help him if the tables were turned!
Our night time exercise was.... unique? I guess I can't say we've done this since our days in our apartment when we were both super skinny (mostly because we couldn't afford food most of the time). Basically, we were to get completely naked and do everything we'd normally do in an evening, but naked. Which.. is interesting since I have a pedophile right behind my house and he can see into parts of our house since I don't have curtains/blinds on the kitchen window, for example. But we did do this. We ended up watching some tv, having popcorn and then just chatting.
Can I be honest? I felt ridiculous doing this. Not only because I'm totally naked for no reason, but because I am still so self conscious about the god damn kangaroo pouch. For the most part I'm fine with it... until I have to literally get naked. Even if it is just for my husband. I will say this exercise was made easier after I did my walk/run for three miles. I feel much better about my body after I work out, so knowing that I made sure I worked extra hard so I would feel less like an idiot. I think this activity was really easy for Matt because he'd run around naked all of the time if you let him. He has no qualms about anything like that and I have to say- I totally admire that about him.
I also want to mention the fact that we are four weeks into this and we are like a totally different couple? We are much more touchy/feely now than we've been in years. Since at least before kids, that's for sure. Even if you don't win this, I really encourage you to go through these weeks and do the exercises yourself. Even if you wanted to get started now, it's kind of awesome. I knew Matt and I were disconnected intimately but I guess I didn't realize how disconnected we were until we started doing this. So I can speak of it's value already.
OK- so every Sunday night I will post about the KY Intimacy Experiment and offer you chances to win your own kit. At the end of the experiment I will put all of your entries from every single post into a bucket to win. So you are going to have a lot of chances to win... I highly encourage you to enter and spread the word. Here are your chances (and you MUST be a follower through GFC, and you MUST leave me your email address so if you win I can contact you!):
1. Comment on this post- would you feel comfortable doing a naked evening with your partner? Why or why not?
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4. "Like" CouplesPlace on Facebook (leave separate comment)
5. Blog about this! Mention my blog series (and link back to this post)! (leave separate comment)