But here's the thing- as of yesterday at noon, I was officially a college dropout. And... it feels weird? I feel like maybe I should add that to my resume, maybe it says I'm unconventional and too cool for school, literally. It certainly wasn't a decision made lightly. I really was on the fence my entire first week. I had gotten ahead on assignments in every class, took a few quizzes already, and it was, so far going alright? But here are the things that played a part:
- Major life change happening soon. I have an entire blog post coming about this soon so just hold tight. Like two more weeks so I can get information and pictures ready for you. Sorry. But know I'm just as anxious as you.
- I honestly think I'm too old. I say that because I'm reading the discussion boards and while I wasn't the oldest, I felt like I was maybe one of the more mature ones? These people were hardcore, all about school. I'm all over here thinking, "I just want to pass, none of this interests me at all."
- I literally cared zero about any of the classes. I couldn't get into readings and I felt like I was totally wasting my time, and the instructors, knowing I'll gain zero from any of this.
- I'm kind of like the old dog who couldn't learn new tricks in a way. I think maybe being 32 years old and having seen life, I've formed opinions and I maybe know too much. I can't look at things objectively anymore like I could when I was 22 even. I can't make the argument for the other side to plays devil's advocate because I just don't care enough.
- One week of being locked away and not seeing or hanging out with my kids was kind of brutal. That's always awesome when you've sent them away, or you're on vacation and you know in a few days you'll see them anyways. But this was like, years of being like this.
- I really did the math on tuition and books and what it would cost us financially and honestly? Not worth it. I have dreams of RV'ing sooner rather than later and honestly, I can be just as happy working at McDonald's as I could using a degree that really isn't going to pay for itself anyways. Having been in a situation with a crushing amount of debt over our heads to now which isn't so bad, I can't go back. I really can't.
So with all that, I've chucked deuces at college life. I thought I'd feel really sad and bummed out and I'm surprised I don't. I feel relieved, I feel kind of like a choice was made for me and in this case I'm alright with that. I think my life is going to work out just fine even if I don't have an awesome degree. Yes, I wish I had continued on after my Associates degree to get my Bachelors, but I didn't and it's fine. Really, it is. I think Matt's relieved, but doesn't want to come out and say it. Which is OK too.
But don't think I have all of this free time on my hands, either. I have lots happening in the next few weeks and months so you'll not see me all lazy and stuff. Nope. Stay tuned.