But nooooooo, I'm just pregnant and hormonal, what do I know??
But week 30. Here we are.
- It really does feel like my vagina is angry because it hurts. It hurts to sit, it hurts to stand, it hurts to lay down, it feels alright if I walk for a bit but then it hurts. No relief. It constantly feels like a bowling ball is trying to come out. Surprisingly, Penelope isn't low, she's clearly hanging out under my boobs and near my ribs. So that's kind of scary, because what if she's just a big baby? Maybe she can be in two places at once?!
- I'm only up 17 pounds this pregnancy, though I feel like that number should be around 50. Admittedly, with Olivia and Jackson I had only gained 15 pounds total with each of them, so Penelope is already breaking records. Again, that's scary.
- Did I mention I passed my glucose test?
- Because that's important when I note that my love for Sweet Tart jelly beans is fierce and I love them so.
- I have nesting urges. It's not an all of the time feeling like with Olivia. I never had it with Jackson and maybe because I basically wasn't in any position to change anything and had gender neutral everything already so I felt ready. But with Penelope, I feel like I'm starting from scratch. But for most of the day, I feel fine. It's in the evening where I get this urge to start scrubbing something clean, folding her things, or I think whatever project we're working on needs to be done right NOW.
- I had my baby shower last weekend! It was amazing, I was totally spoiled and my friends did such a great job. I'll share more on that, and pictures, maybe tomorrow.
- So clearly I've been busy putting everything away and organizing. Then re-organizing.
Overall? I feel really great. Sure I'm exhausted and my vagina hurts, but I really do feel great. I know it seems like I complain a lot, but I actually like being pregnant. I realize that the things I'm dealing with are minor and my body really is meant for birthing babies. It really doesn't need me to help it along, my girl parts collectively know what they are doing and just do it without me.
With that being said, I'm debating when to start my maternity leave. Do I give myself to be home, alone, for a few weeks to get things done and feel OK once she comes? Or do I say screw it and just work until I go into labor? My doctor has been pretty non-committal though she is a fan of pregnant women relaxing as much as possible. So I don't know. I really do need to decide this week and just stick with it and get things in gear and I'm torn.
But I've got 10 weeks left, 70 days, until my due date. Feels like a long time but I know in reality it's a blink of an eye. It'll go by very quickly.