I remember when I was pregnant with my first child and I was asked what name we had picked out and I said we were going with Olivia. People looked at me strangely because back in 2005, you didn't hear a lot of Olivia's.
Then I had her and there were two others in the nursery at the same time and I was secretly glad because I don't want a weirdo, never-heard-of name for my kid. They'll go to school someday, they'll have jobs. Maybe they'll be a telemarketer or something that requires them to say their name a lot and I don't want people butchering it. Maybe they'll be President and you don't want a sissy name or something newscasters can't even pronounce.
My inspiration from her name came from the show Law & Order: SVU and I refuse to feel shame for that. I watched a LOT of it while pregnant and it's just a super pretty name.
Fast forward a couple of years and I find myself pregnant, this time with a boy. I knew what his name was going to be but I struggled with Jack versus Jackson. I have a thing about naming a child something you won't even call them. To me it's like, why bother? So if I liked Jack better, that's what he was going to be. But the longer my pregnancy went on I found I really preferred Jackson and he does, too as it turns out. He'll answer to Jack but every once in awhile he'll correct someone and say his name is JackSON. He really emphasizes it.
During my pregnancy with Penelope I realized people are ridiculously judgmental over names. Like, rudely so. They really hope you're naming your baby something weird so they can immediately criticize it. It's like the most exciting thing about someone you know having a baby, apparently. But I knew she was going to be a Penelope and for no real reason. I just really liked the name. I'm a little annoyed there is a Kardashian named Penelope but I can only hope over time they fade away and nobody will ask me if I used that as my inspiration because no, I did not. I just thought it sounded like a pretty name for a little old lady and I liked how it looked on paper.
When I had her all of the nurses and hospital staff absolutely loved it and kept commenting on what a great name.
I know, I'm an awesome name picker.
Now we have Fetus Four incubating, and that's literally what I've been calling it because I have no other name picked out. My early favorite was Eloise and I got some really strange looks and my dad said he'd call her Weezy. Which, is kind of hilarious and not a reason to not name a kid that because my dad has nicknames for us all so no matter what, this kid is bound to get a good one. Then I kind of liked Lucy. Matt liked Lucy more than Eloise but the more I thought about it, I wasn't sold. My mom mentioned Ophelia, and I really liked that one. Almost immediately. But Matt wasn't sold, and he said we should just do Lucy because it's easy to spell and we'd be done.
I need to mention here that I don't actually have any memory of consulting with him on Olivia or Jackson, I basically filled out the paperwork and that was that. With Penelope I told him it was the only name there was and he'd learn to spell it just fine over time.
So this time... why am I consulting? Why am I so wishy washy on a name? I'm 26 weeks along now and I feel like if I can do nothing else, I need to get a damn name for this baby.
I already told someone I was writing this blog post and they immediately asked if I was worried someone would "steal" my name. Um, nope? Because it's a name- thousands of kids will be born this year with the same exact name. I could care less. I don't feel weird about that kind of thing at all. I also don't really care when people offer me bits of criticism about the names.
So yes. We're basically down to Lucy or Ophelia. I wish my gut, which is never wrong, would kick in and tell me which way I should go.